"For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it."
Hebrews 12:11
Hebrews 12:11
Our job as moms, as parents, is to train these gifts from God in His ways. Life is going to have consequences, walking outside His path has consequenses, it is part of our job to help them learn this. This is not a fun part of parenting. And my kid isn't even 2 yet.
The pastor's wife emphasized that for kids you need to lay out what the expected behavior is, what happens when behavior fits what is "good" and to clearly let them know what the consequences are for behavior that doesn't fit the rules. This is what HaShem did, and we are to be like Him to our children. He stood there, told Israel who He was, who He would always be, what He expected of them, what He promised to do, and what they would face if they didn't hold up their end of the contract. He was very detailed.
In her words, our kids need to here this: "All of us sin, we will all willingly do things we are not supposed to. Even Mom and Dad." But to emphasize that "you always have a choice" she would do something I never thought of doing. In certain areas, especially areas where she or her husband struggled, the whole family would come up with an acceptable consequence. They would look at the action in question and ask "What could the consequence for this be?" For example, if someone screamed at someone else, the punishment would be so many push ups. The logic that follows is that when a child does something he shouldn't do, it makes it easier to turn the question on him "What would an appropriate consequence be for you in this situation?" You always have a choice. If I scream at you, I chose wrong. I pay the consequences too.
And then stand back and let them and face the consequences for their actions. No matter how much it hurts to watch, they deserve to be allowed to face all sin brings. Only then can they hope to show fruits of righteousness.
Rest of the "My Role" series:
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
Part 6
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